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My first case of depersonalization disorder came upon me when I was a young boy.

I remember when I was five years old, and my family was vacationing in Ocean City, Maryland, USA. I went boogie-boarding with my father and we were out together when a large wave came and knocked away the grip my father had on me. After being torn away from my fathers’ grip, like a lucid dream, I still remember being tossed around and being drug down onto the ocean floor, tumbling over numerous times.

The entire duration of my struggle was as if I were trying to capture the very last moments of my life, seemingly in slow-motion. This was all a surreal moment for me, and one that I will hold onto forever. Being so close to death at such a young age, is what I believe to be the very cause of my depersonalization disorder. This was heightened after another family vacation where I suffered a concussion, and broke my tailbone from a stairwell accident when I was fourteen.

I have for some reason or another, stayed close to death with multiple close-calls over the years. This has kept my disorder very much alive for what is now 20 years of living with Depersonalization Disorder.

I have learned to live with this “curse” and I am more open-minded to the world around me having this disorder, which at this point I am confident will follow me until my last days.



\m/ JP Weidemoyer\m/
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